Stepping into the life of a 50+ ballroom dancing enthusiast

A few days ago I sat in on a ballroom dance class, a very new experience for me. I have been attempting to dive into new subcultures, and this seemed like a great place to start. The class was run by Jill, a gym goer who's passion for the dance was so strong she opted to run the classes when the original dance teacher was on holiday. Three years ago the class was at risk of disbanding, not enough people were joining, but thanks to Jill's effort and love of the class, it's now stronger than ever. After inviting everyone she knew from other classes and her treadmill neighbours, she managed to build up a community of people that exceeded a simple dance session. Jill had even gone on to even get engaged at the class, where she met her fiance Ken.

Members often meet up outside the gym, organise evenings out together and even travel to Blackpool for larger ballroom meetups. 

As somebody who has two left feet, and only has experience dancing in dimly lit clubs at two in the morning, this was a challenge! The coordination required for your feet and hands is so much more difficult than imagined. Halfway through the class I was encouraged to join in with someone who was lacking a partner, and I can guarantee you not a single step was taken in the right direction on my part.

Everybody in the class was delightful, the average attendee as stated by regulars was 50+ retirees, looking to add a new hobby to their arsenal. With retirement throwing the average person out of a strict 9-5 schedule into a world of freedom but at the same time uncertainty, I wondered if this class provided security and stability that some people would be seeking. 

“Almost half of people in their fifties said they were not sleeping well over the last year, with two in five reporting being more anxious and almost one in five saying they were finding it harder to look after themselves, compared to a year ago” 

– Published March 2024 by Age UK regarding retirement.

The class consisted of a warm up, and a step by step walk through of a dance that consisted of plenty of twists and turns. I got the chance to talk to a few of the guests over a smoothie afterwards, and they were quick to emphasise the importance of this class in their lives. 

The first two ladies I spoke to were sisters, Irene (67) and Janet (68,) said they had always been interested in ballroom dancing although had never had the opportunity before. The gym they frequent started running the classes a good few years ago and they immediately swiped the opportunity. I asked them if it was daunting walking into a class of up to forty people, especially for the first time. “Even though you struggle at first, eventually, months and months down the line, something clicks, a penny drops. You might only get part of the dance but that's still success.”

“Sometimes you feel really stupid when you can't get the steps… But you have to persevere." I asked them if the challenge aspect is what drew them in the most, and they agreed. 

Do you think there's a community aspect as a whole within the gym itself?

“I don't really know… You find there's people that go to the gym who are really gym bunnies, and then they all know each other.”

So there's kind of sub-communities in the gym?

“Yeah there is, but we all come together in the changing rooms, and talk about the classes we've been in.”

What would you say the average demographic here is?

“There's definitely as you can see a lack of men here. Men don’t feel comfortable… I think they feel embarrassed, almost worried they won't be able to do it.” 

“Jim (another class goer,) said he was the only man for a long time, and he said the hardest part was walking through the front door. But once he was in there with everybody, he loved it.”

One of the ladies recited a story their friend Gazza had told them: “He was out on a night out and he’d had a drink and was dancing with this girl. He was having a great time, he looked round to his friend and they were all taking the mickey out of him, and it crushed him. He's never danced since.” 

She reassured him it's because they were jealous because you got the girl.

They went on to reminisce how they would dance with their dad and how men used to be more confident with expressing themselves through dance, both exclaiming at the same time how they both used to stand on their dads feet while he would teach them the steps. Their final statements in the interview were: “if you can dance you will always get the girl.”

I went on to talk to Jim (69,) who the ladies above were referencing. He started out as the only male member of the dance class, so a lot of the ladies had to play the ‘male role.’ Although more men have joined since, Jim had been a part of the class for three years. He said crossing the threshold of the door to the dance class was the most difficult thing to do. I asked him why he thought the class was so heavily dominated by women, “I think historically dancing has always been a woman's thing, especially my generation… When I first went to the class I stood outside the door thinking, ‘should I, shouldn't I?’ but they saw me through the window and well that's history.”  He also mentioned how he posed the idea of coming to the dance class to the men he plays badminton with but he was only met with a sour face. 

Would you say your passion for the dance or the community aspect is more important to you?

“Well I’ve always wanted to learn to dance, the community is a bonus. It gives you purpose as well, when you retire you start looking for this purpose. It gets you a little bit fitter as well.”

The next people I talked to were Jo (52) and Aruni (32,) I asked them what had initially drawn them to this class. Jo said, “I’ve been wanting to do ballroom dancing for a long time, I just didn’t realise the opportunity was here.” She went on to mention that when she first saw people walk into the class and change into their dance shoes she was very intimidated, thinking “oh no i’ve made a mistake.” But because the group was so welcoming and friendly she soon felt at ease. “Very inclusive, very supportive, and just really good for your wellbeing… Everything in my diary works around it.”

Aruni mentioned how she initially started with high intensity classes but it doesn't allow as much community building, that the ballroom dancing class was a lot more sociable, and easy to work around their  work from home schedule, as one of the few members who hadn't yet retired.

Sue (56) had only been a part of the group for eight months at the time of this interview but spoke very highly of the class. “When I was first diagnosed with MS, I was told to exercise but I couldn't walk at the time. She (the doctor) said I don’t care what you do as long as you’re moving.” 

Sue talked further about her chronic illness, and how crucial exercise was to her life, “It’s not exercise where you’re going out for a great big sweat. You’re exercising all of your senses.” 

She went on  to mention the benefits of exercise, and how frequently looking after your body can also look after your brain, so people with dementia are regularly encouraged to exercise. The Alzheimer's society has actually stated that exercise is the best way of reducing your chances of developing dementia.

“The first class that I came to I felt like I had met my tribe. When I first came I was feeling a bit down and tired, but when I left I was buzzing. If you were to go and do zumba, that's just what you do in the gym, but this is your life.”  

There was a clear sense of community within this little class tucked away in a quiet corner of Bolton; exceeding past a need to exercise but creating routine for those whose life possibly hasn't known structure since their retirement, as well as those just looking for a little boogie.